Journal of Pirate Lingo*

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* not an actual journal
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03.10.04 - 10:37 a.m.

random thoughts on a hot day

the sun is out, which implies i should do something outdoorsy this weekend. frisbee throwing is right out, since i've never been able to do it right, and after countless dispiriting attempts to throw straight, my self-esteem ends up tracing an arc similar to that of the frisbee (sideways, into the ground).

hiking? camping? surfing? i am not an outdoorsy person by nature, so i have to mentally jog through the kinds of things one does when it's sunny.

play grand theft auto with the blinds pulled down?

I THINK WE HAVE A WINNER


last night i was describing to emily how i intend to do a photoessay documenting the extreme ugliness of 16th & mission BART. i have to take pictures because otherwise you'll never believe how ugly it is. all the tiles in the station are discolored, grimy shades of blue, green and beige. a few months ago they completed a station 'renovation' that somehow managed to make the station even *more* ugly. i still don't fully comprehend how this was even possible. it's like going faster than the speed of light. anyway i'm fascinated by the notion that someone actually designed the station this way. it's not like it just evolved out of concrete and tile. what i should really do is track down the person responsible and conduct some hard-hitting investigative journalism. potential interview questions:

Q: Your bart station is SO ugly!

Q: Seriously, it's really ugly.

Q: Were drugs involved at all?

Q: Where are you going?


I really have to pee. When you first get an inkling that you need to take a wizz, do you go right away? Or do you hold it till the last possible moment? I do the latter, even thought it results in a fair amount of discomfort. It's just cuz I'm lazy.

Have you ever peed in the sink?

I read some interview where the guy was talking about John Cleese, at least I think it was John Cleese. "Once I walked into the house and John was sitting in the sink. I asked him what he was doing and he said he'd been sitting there all day, because he wanted to see what life was like from that perspective."

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