Journal of Pirate Lingo*


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* not an actual journal
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04.18.03 - 2:44 p.m.

Yesterday I was gonna go work out at the gym, but then Mitch asked if I wanted to go see Caddyshack at the Parkway. I contemplated my options for several moments before realizing that I had to go see this classic of American cinema. (There could be no other choice; in fact, it can be mathematically proven that I had to skip the gym. The proof is trivial, and left as an exercise for the reader.)

The Parkway is a cool theater in Oakland where you can sit in comfortable couches, heckle at will and have nachos and beer delivered to your seat. Why aren't all movie houses like this? I remember one in Austin that was similar, but it surprises me that they're not everywhere. It was a good environment in which to watch Caddyshack, and re the movie I will simply say: not since Cannonball Run II has such a splendid cast been assembled. My favorite part was when Rodney Dangerfield joyfully exclaims (after winning a golf tournament, but apropo to nothing really): "Hey everybody!!! We're all gonna get laid!!!" I highly recommend making this the sound that plays when you get new mail.

At the Parkway I met Mitch's friend Ryan, who is a professional magician. Really! That's his job! I found this very exciting. I wanted to ask him to do some tricks but I figured that would be like bugging a doctor at a party. "I've got this pain in my knee, do you think it's SARS?"

Tonight's the Notwist show at Slim's. I would link to the Notwist website, but it's insanely irritating and it's not like you ever click on any of my links anyway.

I am 33% rock with a twist of lime.

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