Journal of Pirate Lingo*


leave me a note

older entries

newest entry


* not an actual journal
of pirate lingo

03.29.05 - 5:58 p.m.

I can't stop eating wasabi peas! I like how your nostrils burn for a second after crunching down. They taste good with beer.

How many carbs in wasabi peas? I will research this question so you don't have to. (pause)

Nutrition Facts, Trader Joe's Wasabi Peas:
Serving Size 1/3 cup (30.0g)
Calories per serving: 80
Total Carbohydrates: 12.0g (4% daily requirement)

Hmm, I can't have had more than a cup's worth of these things. Healthier than Goldfish anyway.

When I was in college, drinking frequently led to the eating of Cheezits. They just always seemed to be around. Let me check on the Cheezit data. (pause)

Nutrition Facts, Reduced Fat Cheez-Its:
Serving Size: 30 Crackers (30.0g)
Calories per serving: 140
Total Carbohydrates: 20.0g (7% daily requirement)

Damn. I was hoping the difference between Wasabi Peas and Cheezits would be more dramatic. Well, at least I'm not eating a Swanson Hungryman dinner.

I've heard bar peanuts described as "the most effective way to distribute penis germs throughout a bar." I guess the logic is that guys often don't wash their hands after taking a piss.

previous -- next