Journal of Pirate Lingo*


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* not an actual journal
of pirate lingo

09.07.01 - 5:25 p.m.

I dreamt a girl was trying to convince me to press a small red button, which would cause a tremendous earthquake. I didn't want to do it, but she said it was like skydiving. She told me I'd feel better once I'd conquered my fear.

(Note to self-- could dream BE any less subtle? Revise later.)

William came & went. He was a bit of a sourpuss but in spite of that I had a good time. We

  • stumbled into a hilarious impromptu showing of Goodness Gracious Me

  • ate all you can eat bbq at Bottom of the Hill, while listening to untalented, excruciatingly loud rock band(s)

  • checked out MOMA-- this was the 3rd time I've seen the science & tech exhibit so I didn't feel obligated to look at everything; but very cool Brian Eno installation, "Compact Forest Proposal". generative music, dangling christmas lights in a dark room, fake spectator creeped me right out

  • Strolled around the haight-- I picked up some abstract postmodern hiphop (Anticon). Rumor is you either love it or else violently hurl it against the wall.

  • Sauntered through Golden Gate Park-- it was lovely weather. We saw these people constructing a huge geodesic dome; they were doing a dry run for Burning Man

  • Watched Gen X Cops-- so much fun!!! It had two parachute sequences, balletic gun battles, kung fu, evil villains who wear leather jackets with nothing underneath, incredibly hot asian female with australian accent named "haze", comedy hijinx, jackie chan cameo, AND the hong kong convention center blowing up.

  • Played darts at Bitter End-- it took approximately 10 hrs for Shawn & I to close out the fucking bullseye. What we needed was a Special Olympics dartboard, where the entire board is one big bullseye.

  • That's all i can think of. Too bad, there were so many synonyms for "walk" left. I didn't even get to use "beat one's feet", "heel and toe it" or "ride shanks' mare". Thank you

What else. We finally tried the vodka watermelon. It was alright, although not as potent as I'd hoped. I think there could be a big market for alcoholic fruit. May I suggest kahlua-bananas?

I listened to Monolake 10 times yesterday. Microscopic crackling reminds me of sounds you would hear if you shrunk to the size of bacteria, raving inside someone's chest. The mighty thump of the heart sending shudders down your spine... except you don't have a spine. This image is crumbling. That is the recurring image of late, crumbling. I read these fantasy books when I was younger, about a guy named Raistlin who was cursed so that his pupils became hourglasses and everything he looked at, he saw decaying. When he looked at a young girl he would see her when she was 96, teeth falling out. Trees became hollowed blackened stumps. I imagine if he was alive today he would spend most of his time looking at plastic bags and styrofoam cups, because THEY LAST.

What the point of this all is I don't know. Certainly not to convey how ephemeral each day seems. Everyone knows time is fleeting. Most cliches are true, but truth is not the only thing worth seeking. The best storytellers are the best liars; the best dreams are the least real. I would suggest finding something you like and clutching it tightly.

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