05.10.01 - 8:46 a.m.

A. and I went to Sigur Ros last night. Shrey & Anne-Marie came along as well. They are now a couple. On the one hand I'm happy that I had a hand in this pairing, but something about it annoys me. I have picked my brain trying to figure out what exactly bothers me... it is one of those cases where I can't really understand my own feelings. Another example would be, I always feel tears well up in my eyes when I hear the "THX: The Audience is Listening" sound.

Sigur Ros were alright. They play really ambient, plodding stuff with occasional bursts of rock noise. Sort of like Mogwai, but the thing that makes Sigur Ros stand out is the singer's *amazing* voice. He really hits the high notes.

They play at such a glacial pace though... slow-core in the style of Low. It's the kind of music that goes well with fucking or doing the dishes or any type of activity, but I can't really sit still and listen to it for more than an hour without getting fidgety. Like any ambient music I guess. We ended up leaving before they finished, because we (I) was on the verge of snoring.

Some observations:

1) The Sigur Ros singer had the worst posture I have EVER seen in a rock star! His spine looked like a question mark.

2) He plays his guitar with a bow.

3) The Warfield is definitely my least favorite venue in San Francisco. The staff are surly and brutish, the space is cavernous and distant, and: the cruelest indignity of all: YOU CAN'T TAKE DRINKS TO YOUR SEAT!! What is that about?

On the way home there was an incident on the bus. These two women (I think they were crackheads) were fighting. Actually it was one beating up on the other. A. and I just sat there in shock at first. It's strange to watch a fight happen. It looked like it was occurring in slow motion. The first girl was really whaling on the second, who just cringed and tried to defend herself. By the time I finally gathered up the courage to say "you should leave her alone" and stand up to break it up, some other people had stepped in. I was kind of relieved. Physical confrontation is definitely not my bag... I'm a lover not a fighter... or a coward, depending on how you look at it.

I get pissed at all these people who say (in regards to the Sept. 11th hijackings) "Man, if I was on the plane I would have fought those hijackers." That kind of armchair courage is such bullshit. The truth is, you have no idea how you'd react to armed hijackers on a flight. We all would like to think of ourselves as brave, but it's not until the heat of the moment that you can truly know.

Things have been good with A. lately. At times I've felt like I should break up with her, that she & I are just not right for each other. But other times I feel like that's crazy talk.

She does do little things that annoy me. Like for instance, she says "SOOOOO good" about 1000 times a day. "That pizza was sooooo good, that show was sooooo good, that shower felt soooooo good." I feel like having her arrested for superlative abuse, or least forcing her to learn synonyms. I sound like a jerk don't I? I know it's a petty thing to get annoyed about, but I can't help it.

But those things never seem to matter much when we wake up together and mumble incoherently about our dreams, or when we sit in the darkness listening to Icelandic rock. I am not much of a romantic, but that was definitely a romantic moment.

So now that I'm unemployed, I've been looking for new ways to make fast cash. Oh, you're suggesting male prostitution? (withering glance) How very witty and original of you.

So far the only thing I've done is a 'focus group'. This was the easiest $85 I've ever made in my life! Basically you go to a building, where you are fed excellent sandwiches & snacks. Then you sit around with a bunch of strangers for two hours, answering questions about your consumer habits. The focus group I attended was on digital cameras. It was actually kind of interesting because it made me think about the ways in which having a digital camera has changed my approach to photography. (For instance, I take way more pictures than I used to.) I did feel a certain amount of inchoate guilt for greasing the wheels of consumerism... but come on, $85 for two hours of talking!!

What else can I do to make money. Plasma donation? Guinea pig for experimental drugs? I should start paying more attention to those "MAKE $$$$ FAST!!" emails.

Last weekend: damn I am too lazy, I never update and then I forget everything. The main things I did last weekend were:

1) hang out with Sandeep and his hilarious friends. they have known each other since high school and have a finely tuned sense of comic timing & give & take. Indy and Nini were visiting from Boston. Nini obsessively enters contests/sweepstakes/drawings, and she wins a lot of stuff. This time she won a free trip from MTV, to go to a Crystal Method show in San Francisco. Indy to Sandeep: "We ain't going to no damn Crystal Method show. Let's hang." So they took the trip to SF but totally blew off MTV.

2) go to folsom street festival. this is a leather/s&m/fetish festival. it was a.'s idea, not mine. i got some good pictures, which I will post soon. that is, if i get off my lazy ass, which seems unlikely given that my ass is so comfy right here and the camera is all the way over there.

before that we went to brunch party at mike's place, which is located right there on Folsom in the heart of the festival. Mike's apartment is what city dwellers politely refer to as "cosy" (e.g. it looks like a closet with a sink and shower). But, he managed to fit about 20 people in there. I am always impressed by the ingenuity of urban folk. Or maybe it's just insane delusion.

3) play "neuromancer" on c64 emulator. it's been a while since I got sucked into a virtual world. I find myself getting irritated by all the real world distractions. "the phone's ringing AGAIN? goddammit, why can't everybody on earth temporarily die?"

Mattorb called me yesterday and said "hey, they dropped the # of frequent flier miles you need for a free trip. Should I fly to San Francisco tomorrow?" I like that boy's style! His flight gets here soon...